CHAMPS is a band from the Isle of Wight. They have appeared on the British Council's Selector music radio show. 'Down Like Gold' is the name of this song and it's also the name of their first album.

CHAMPS appeared on the British Council's Selector music radio programme, which brings you the best of new, British music. To find out more about CHAMPS and to listen to more of their music, have a look at their website. Music and lyrics by Michael & David Champion (cc).

Preparation: matching

Match the vocabulary with the correct definition and write a–h next to the numbers 1–8.

1. …….. a suburb    a. to make eye contact with someone, to attract someone’s attention
2. …….. to catch someone’s eye    b. to attach (someone or something to something with a string or rope)
3. …….. the heavens    c. to pass one end of a piece of cotton or thread etc. through something
4. …….. to break down    d. a long, thin, pointed weapon
5. …….. to tie    e. a residential area on the outskirts of a city
6. …….. an arrow    f. the sky (poetic)
7. …….. to thread through    g. to have the opportunity to do something
8. …….. to get to do something    h. to become emotionally destroyed

Bully

The messages are getting worse, and Kay is really getting desperate. But what can she do?

Kay got another message as she was leaving for school.

unknown number: You’re so ugly.

She put her phone back in her pocket and set off for the bus stop. There were more messages every day now and it was really getting her down. She didn’t know who it was or why they were picking on her. It might be more than one person. They kept changing names. The phone beeped again. 

candybear76: freak!

She’d always got on well with everyone and she couldn’t think why anyone would do this to her. Now her friends were avoiding her. Becky was the only one who’d stayed by her. They’d been friends since they were six. The phone beeped again. I’m not going to look, she thought. But what if it was Mum? She looked. It was a comment on her Facebook profile picture.

princesspusheen: Stop taking photos of yourself. No one wants to look at you. Loser!

Her heart was pounding now. She turned her phone off. She’d tried to delete the posts and block the user but they kept coming back with a different name. Becky thought it must be a hacker. Kay had sent messages to the sites telling them what was happening but they’d done nothing yet.

Becky was waiting for her at the bus stop. 'Hi, Kay, are you all right? You look terrible!' 'No, I’ve been getting those stupid messages all morning. I’ve got to do something, Becky. I’m starting to go mad. Do you think I should go to the police?' 'Well, you could try,' said Becky. 'But I heard they won’t do anything. And besides, he’s probably using anon.com. Hackers use that site to hide their identity so the police will never be able to find them. Anyway, I wanted to tell you, I think I might know who it is ...' Just then the bus came and they got on.

There were lots of kids from school on the bus. Kay felt they were all looking at her. Julie McGann was whispering something to her friend. They both started laughing. Kay and Becky sat down. 'Who is it?' asked Kay. 'Shh! He’s sitting at the back. Don’t look!' Kay looked around. Ollie Jones was sitting on the back seat. He was looking at his phone. 'But why?' asked Kay. 'Well, you did just finish with him, didn’t you?' said Becky. 'What? We weren’t even going out,' said Kay. 'And I don’t even like him.' 'Yeah, well I heard he really liked you.'

That day at school was terrible. When she didn’t have classes with Becky no one would sit next to her and everyone kept looking at her then looking away. She should have left her phone switched off but she didn’t. She couldn’t stop herself from looking at the messages.

The world's weirdest food

How hungry would you have to be to eat a brain sandwich? What about some fried spider? Read this to find out about the world’s weirdest food.

Preparation

Match the unusual food with the country, and write a–f next to the numbers 1–6. If you don’t know, have a guess!

1. …….. USA                       a. Horse milk beer
2. …….. Japan                      b. Brain sandwiches
3. …….. The Philippines      c. Jellied moose nose
4. …….. Norway                  d. Duck egg (with embryo inside)
5. …….. Mongolia               e. Smoked sheep’s head
6. …….. Canada                   f. Tuna eyeball

Feeling Hot! Hot! Hot!

Your mouth is burning, your eyes are watering and you're sweating ... but some people love it! Watch this video about chillies and find out why they are spicy for us, but a bird can eat them just fine.

Do the preparation task first. Then, watch the video and do the exercises. Remember you can read the tapescript at any time.

Preparation

Match the vocabulary with the correct definition and write a–f next to the number 1–6.

1. ….. to crush      a. a kind of vegetable with a spicy taste. It's usually red, yellow or green
2. ….. to swallow      b. a scale used to measure the spiciness of foods
3. ….. a seed      c. to want to have something to eat or drink
4. ….. a chilli      d. to break something by pressing down hard on it
5. ….. Scoville heat units      e. to send food down from your mouth into your stomach
6. ….. to fancy something      f. a part of a plant that can grow into a new plant of the same kind

A story

Look at the short story and do the exercises to improve your writing skills.

Exam question

Write a story with the title “The English Exam”. You should use a variety of tenses and your story must be between 180 and 220 words.

Top Tips for writing

1. Your story should have a clear beginning, middle and end.

2. Use clear paragraphs.

3. Use a variety of narrative tenses.

4. Use direct speech or indirect speech when the characters talk.

April Fool's Day

Is there a special day for jokes and tricks in your country? Do you like playing tricks on people? If you're ever in the UK on April 1st, you'd better watch out!

When and what is April Fool’s Day?

April Fool’s Day is on April 1st. It‘s the custom in the UK to play a trick or a joke on someone on this day. If the person falls for the joke then they are called an ‘April Fool’. In fact it’s only half a day because April Fool’s Day finishes at midday. No more jokes after lunchtime, please!

What kind of tricks do people play?

Here are some April Fool’s tricks from around the world:

• In the 90s Burger King published an advert in the magazine USA Today offering new ‘Left-handed Whoppas’ for the 32 million left-handed Americans! Thousands of customers ordered the new burger in the restaurants!
• A zoo in Japan said that they had a giant penguin that was 165cm tall and weighed 80 kilograms! In fact it was a man dressed up in a penguin suit.
• Last year in the UK a children’s news programme said that scientists had invented a ‘Brain Band’. It was a coloured head band that you put on your head and it helped to make you more intelligent! In an on-line poll, 47% of the children who heard the news wanted to buy a ‘brain band’!
• In 1949 a radio presenter in New Zealand told listeners that there were millions of wasps coming to invade. He told viewers to wear their socks over their trousers and to put honey on their doors. Millions of listeners believed him!
• In 1976 a very famous British astronomer told radio listeners that at 9.47am the earth was going to experience a feeling of less gravity. He said that Jupiter and Pluto would cross and if listeners jumped in the air at exactly 9.47am they would feel the sensation of having no gravity! Hundreds of listeners phoned the radio to say they had jumped and floated in the air!
• Ikea announced that the shop had launched a dog highchair (highchairs are usually for babies!) named 'HUNDSTOL' (Swedish for dog chair). Google 'IKEA dog high chair' for more details.
• The free London newspaper, The Metro, came up with a novel idea to deal with the problem of litter on the underground (unfortunately it was only a joke). They said that the newspaper was now edible – ‘the only paper that you can eat after reading’.
• A British newspaper announced that Portugal had 'sold' Cristiano Ronaldo, the footballer, to Spain for €160million. Why? To try to clear its national debt. It was a joke of course.

Do people actually like April Fool’s Day?

We asked some Brits this question. This is what they said:

I love April Fool’s Day. It can be really good fun. I love playing tricks on people and I don’t mind if people play tricks on me. It’s one day of the year you can be really silly and have a laugh and it’s okay. You have to be quite sensible for the other 364 days of the year, so I look forward to April 1st.

Malisa

I don’t like April Fool’s Day. It makes me a bit nervous. I keep thinking someone is about to play a trick on me. When twelve o’clock passes I feel quite relieved that it’s finished for another year!

Johnny

When I was at school April Fool’s Day was always good fun. We played tricks on each other and sometimes on the teacher. In fact, one year one of the boys at school put a bucket of water on top of the door and when the chemistry teacher came in he got very wet! It was funny, but the boy got in big trouble!

Phil

April Fool’s Day is a great idea. It’s easy to forget the actual date and I always believe everything I read in the newspapers or watch on the TV news. I usually believe the big national hoaxes and it always makes me laugh afterwards. It’s good to remind us that maybe we shouldn’t always believe everything we hear in the news.

Louise

April Fool’s Day is fun when you’re young. I remember putting a plastic fried egg on my dad’s plate for breakfast as a trick. He decided to cut it up and pretend to eat it! Now I think some of the tricks are a bit silly and people can be a bit cruel playing tricks on their ‘friends’!

Clare

I hate April Fool’s Day. Last year people at work changed the sugar for salt so we all put salt in our coffee! Then some joker in the office decided he wanted a day off and he did something to the computers so they wouldn’t work. It just wasn’t funny! I had lots to do and we all had to stop working and solve the problem.

Mark

So watch out this year on April 1st!

Read the text about April Fool’s Day then do these exercises to check your understanding. 

1. Check your understanding: true or false 

Circle True or False for these sentences. 

1. April Fool’s Day is on April 13.                                          True          False 
2. You can play tricks on people all day on April Fool’s Day.   True          False 
3. An April Fool is a person who plays a joke on someone after midday.    True          False 
4. The media (TV, radio, newspapers, etc.) and international companies invent stories to trick people on April Fool’s Day.                                                True          False 
5. People play tricks on their friends and family on April 1st.     True          False 
6. Most people don’t like April Fool’s Day.                              True          False 

2. Check your understanding: gap fill 

Complete the gaps with a word from the box. 

planets burgers insects paper 

penguin invention sports person dogs 

1. A fast-food chain advertised _______________ for left-handed people. 
2. A man pretended to be an extra large _______________ at a Japanese zoo. 
3. A TV programme told children about an _______________ which can make you more intelligent. 
4. Radio listeners were worried about _______________ in New Zealand. 
5. An astronomer said that the position of the _______________ would change gravity. 
6. A shop told customers about a special piece of furniture for _______________. 
7. A London newspaper told readers that their news was printed on edible _______________. 
8. The British media said that Portugal sold a top _______________ to solve the country’s financial problems.

3. Check your understanding: matching 

Match the expressions (1-8) with the correct definition (a-h) and write a – h next to the number 1 – 8. 

1…….. really good fun                                                a. have a lot of problems 

2…….. I don’t mind                                                    b. to not go to work 

3…….. have a laugh                                                    c. not be serious 

4…….. I keep thinking                                                d. very entertaining 

5…….. get in big trouble                                             e. it’s not a problem for me 

6…….. national hoax                                                   f. not very intelligent 

7…….. a bit silly                                                         g. a joke or trick on the entire country 

8…….. a day off                                                         h. I worry 

Do you have a day similar to April Fool’s Day in your country? 

When is it? Is it on the same day as April Fool’s Day? 

What kind of tricks and jokes do people like to play on each other? 

Can you remember any funny jokes or tricks from the past? 

Can you think of a good trick or joke to play on someone next year? 

Answers to April Fool’s Day exercises. 

1. Check your understanding: true or false

1. False 
2. False 
3. False 
4. True 
5. True 
6. False 

2. Check your understanding: gap fill 

1. burgers 
2. penguin 
3. invention 
4. insects 
5. planets 
6. dogs 
7. paper 
8. sports person 

3. Check your understanding: matching 

1. d 
2. e 
3. c 
4. h 
5. a 
6. g 
7. f 
8. b